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Thursday, February 11, 2010

Confession

Yesterday I stole something from Target.  

I got out to my car, loaded Ben (who had just fallen asleep, it's important to note) and his carseat into the back, and noticed a file box at the bottom of my cart.  A file box that had been at the bottom of my cart for most of my shopping, including the part where I paid for everything else.  I knew immediately that I had technically stolen this file box, but I also knew that in my heart I hadn't really stolen it.  Therefore, I convinced myself that it was okay to leave (did I mention my kid had just fallen asleep in the carseat?) and pay for my stolen goods the next time I was going back into Target anyway.

My squeaky-clean husband disapproved of that plan.  When I told him the story, he insisted that I go back last night and make amends, which I did (after much grumbling).  All the way to Target, I mentally rehearsed the amusing way I would recount this story to the clerk (the manager?  the security guard?  I didn't know how this thing would go down).  So I was a little taken aback when I walked in with my shameful file box... and went right up to the check-out counter with it, just like everyone else was doing with their merchandise.  It was a total let-down.  I did tell the clerk my story, though, but he really didn't care.  Maybe next time I need to steal something bigger, just to make it worth my while.

Now it's your turn.  Anything you need to confess to the dozen or so people who read this blog?  (And everyone can participate now!  I changed my settings, so you don't have to have a Google account to comment.)

7 comments:

Michael said...

i wiped my daughters runny nose with the inside of her shirt.

i stole my son's valentine's candy.

Megan said...

My mother says that I tried to steal a candy bar from the 5 and 10 in town (yes, that's how old I am!), but she foiled the plan and made me repent of my evil ways in front of the store clerk. :)

Daniel said...

I can't believe you put this story on the internet. The cops will be knocking on the door any second. I suggest we disappear, maybe to somewhere in the Caribbean.

WigintonFamily said...

I don't think I have bathed Asher in well over a week.

Dawne C. said...

I'm disappointed that there is not a staged picture of Ben visiting his convict Mommy or something...
I have lied and told BOTH my daughters: "YOU are my favorite!" :) haha- j/k
LOVE YOU!

alisha herring said...

this is so funny, but true! I stole a little puzzle when I was a kid, maybe like 5 or 6. I did not just steal this from Wal-Mart, I stole from a CHRISTIAN bookstore, of all things! And then when I get it home, i am so proud of it that I show it off to my dad who proceeds to ask where I got it and so I then tell exactly how it all happened. My parents made me take it back to the owner and she asked if I had asked Jesus to forgive me. I will never forget that!

Jan Giles said...

Hey, Micah, you and I can share a cell if Daniel is right and you are about to be hauled off to jail. I did the same thing with a pack of gum at Target. . . and felt the same letdown when I made the 20-mile-round-trip journey to make restitution. Turn me in--maybe they will reduce your sentence!